lettering and layers

 page 49

even mandalas are layered! :)

pages 47,46

the writing on the left is actually journaling, intentionally difficult to read, for my eyes only. still, using journaling in your artwork is a way to both detail a background and include the most personal part of yourself. the best part is you can be sloppy if, like me, you are extremely OCD about your handwriting....

pages 50, 48

these two pages are side-by-side so you can see my layering obsession. layering in organic lines as opposed to straight lines takes away the pressure of perfection. i do it more because i love the lines nature uses in almost all of it's creations. i would love to go on and on about things like fractals and chaos and other mathematical sequences that are universal, but as much as i love science, i know nothing about any of it, except that i have seen examples and admire the beauty of it all.

how my journaling started

i used to write endlessly in my personal journals. i was born with a LOVE for the physical act of writing, and kept many diaries and keepsake journals. but the matters i wrote about in my young adult years were things that bothered me, so i was actually giving permission to my brain to continue obssessing. yes, i unwaveringly believe that this process is cathartic and useful, and that writing out thoughts can dismiss them from your mind, but i also found that i kept returning to my journals for affirmation that i had reasons to be crazy. by rereading entries, i opened old crap for re-examination, which eventually made the thought processes spin further out of control.

i continued writing for years, sometimes pages filled with small longhand, other times a few disjointed words scrawled, painted or carved into the paper, but really very few drawings of any kind. the written word was seemingly more understandable to my imaginary readers? my only "art" was done separately from my journals, for classes mostly...

at the time i was most prolific with written journals, i was the most ill. i didn't care that my rantings were very unpleasant and disturbing to others. i was still new to my braincrap (as it presented during these years), and i was unsure of what to make of it.  i was scared, suicidal and in moments of lucidity, embarassed. this dark period (that sounds so artistic) overlapped with my bachelor's studies in art therapy and psychology. at one point my art therapy professor (thank you, M) expressed concern over my art therapy class journal and projects. he insisted i find a therapist, and i did.

and the excrutiatingly slow process of mental rehab (through self-imposed art therapy) begins...

a new journal

i have so many written journals, from college/post-college years, where i let the raw stuff reside. those will always stay private. then there is my large collage journal (magazine cuttings given new life).  i will get around to posting some of that...both had some drawings and illustrations, but not many.
but i have wanted to combine written and art journaling in the same book since i have wandered through some of the most amazing blogs-- where artists bravely put up their incredible visual journals depicting personal and sometimes difficult days...  it seems to me to be the most perfect creative endeavor...and i know from experience that it is the very best therapy.
here are the first few page layouts from a new journal i started. it's a Canson 10x10 -natural (tan) pages. the paper is smooth, and i used my usual microns, bic mark-its, sharpies, and colored pencils. i want this to be a written/illustrated collection of my favorite childhood memories.  we'll see how that pans out.

 

 

 

 

 

i finally figured out, with help from kgkeiser on youtube (thanks!) how to create a copyright overlay (or layer), which you can adjust opacity on, and save as a pattern to protect the art you post.  i have used a copyright image on the other stuff i've posted, but individually, and with only my name.  it was a pain, and doesn't work to protect smaller pieces, or work with lots of detail, as areas can still be cropped....yes, i AM paranoid, and new in the online posting world.
this can turn into a whole copyright/not discussion, and i have read many blog opinions on the topic, and understand the overall frustration with viewing copyrighted work. i see how easy it is to have your stuff ripped off too (like lauren nassef -or any of the other hundreds of artists here).  how depressing to go through that site....
so i will use this rather weak attempt to deter any possible infringement. which i know is completely impossible.
on THAT note!!!  thanks for viewing.