no relationships for me, thanks.

 

one of my recent relationships gone down under the weight of my OCD (page 37). i have severe trust issues, but still jump in when i find someone interesting. a new friendship is always refreshing: sharing and disclosing...then it hits. my overwhelming need to know it's permanent and that i can keep trusting. the need to know i'm really wanted. vulnerability pulls me into obsessive cycles of dependence and frustration, and the poor person runs. it's completely my fault, as i see it happening and despite attempts to control it and even stop it, it takes over my brain and ruins everything good in my life. i fucking hate it.

pages 38 and 39

page 40

challenge to stay open-ended. LOL.

inch-batch -undesirables

we all have those pieces we ditch....crappy colors, no depth, whatever.  these are a batch of my least favorite inchies this summer.  i still have a hard time thinking these are anything more than doodles we draw while talking on the phone or waiting in a doc's office...these aren't "art", are they?  they have become an obsession, though, and a therapeutic way to pass time...so they made the grade for my blog.

 

 

not sure what was going through my head here 

- except maybe an excessive need for control!!  ")